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http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/adoption-agencys-bankruptcy-devastates-families/article1217223/

Mara – no mei mei for squirt…

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Trust me, it hurts. A lot. Like swallowing a thousand razor blades in a mouthful of drool, and it leaves you choking and a little panicked by it all. So anyway, tons of meds and some AWESOME, GODSENT mouthwash, and I have moved beyond the insanity and the creeping anxiety everytime I felt the need to swallow. It made me freak out a little when the walk-in doctor asked if the doctors in the emergency department had even looked in my mouth the previous day….  Hmmm thanks emerg!

Now onto a subject that is just exhausting me! And I’m white! And privileged in ways I am sure I have not yet acknowledged! And I’m heterosexual! And I’m middle class! Did I mention I am white? And I live in Canada!  

 ENOUGH with the slant eye gesture! Es tu Miley? Es tu Miley?

mileycyrusasianmockingppw7

Now I could start the whole southern-God-fearing-trailerpark-cousin-marrying-idiot-parent analogies, but  that would be uncalled for. And I would only gain a moment of satisfaction until the self-loathing would creep in. So I rise above.

So, it’s the racist ‘chink eye’ gesture again. Dude, my Chinese daughter does not need to see that shit from a Disney Billion Dollar Empire. And can I once again say how incredibly sick I am of the non-apology? (See here).  And that poor Asian guy in the picture, just coming to realize that his friends are a bunch of racists. Sigh.  

Miley says her actions were taken out of context. I have a tidy little sum running on whether she knows what that actually means. All she has to do is provide said context. And poor Miley, she was just trying to make ‘goofy faces’. Because, you know, those asians are really goofy looking. How can she be expected to control herself?  And the kicker is that she can’t believe SHE is being targetted for being a racist when God has a plan for her and the evil media are just trying to get hits on their websites or copies of trashmags sold, and her fans know her heart, and she’s really just a young, silly girl. Wow. It sucks to be the victim doesn’t it Miley? Because of course how could some slant eye ever understand anything about being marginalized, being discriminated against or having to watch some un-taught child do the equivalent of calling you the n-word? Because that gesture is exactly the same thing. The. Exact.Same.Thing.  And please don’t argue, because as a whitey you (and me) do NOT get to tell people of colour what is and is not racist. You just don’t.

And now I’d like to hate-on so called allies. You know who you are. You are the white parents of children of colour who don’t want your children to see racism behind every tree. You don’t want your child to run away with a ‘victimhood’ mentality, or to be ‘oversensitive’, or to walk around being constantly ‘offended’.  You say you’ll be there ‘if’ they encounter racism. IF?!  What you are teaching them is that YOU are insensitive! YOU are sending them the message that being one of ‘those’ people is not desirable. Of course your child never mentions anything about being the victim of racism…. because you, the parents, are racist. And the zipper is stuck on your white privilege bag. And it’s hard, but you have to be willing to learn, to unpack and do better. Your children deserve it. The gesture is not in good fun, the gesture perpetuates the beliefs of a racist society. If you are not Asian you do not know what it’s like to be Asian. If you are not adopted, you will never know how it feels to be adopted. These are not things we should teach our children to let ‘roll off their backs’. We need our children to know that we know it’s wrong and we will not let them navigate through a racist world without us having their back. And working actively to dismantle a power structure that refuses to fundamentally acknowledge and accept our children. Our children of colour. Yes, sometimes I hate my fellow adoptive parents. We can be so fucking clueless.

And once again the way to apologize is to say “I’m sorry. I’ll do better” and then sit down and shut up. A little hint in case you are having trouble formulating an apology, never, ever use the word “if”. Never.

Mara ~ I think I’m back 🙂

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I did a little happy dance, and shed a little tear.

So congratulations to my neighbours to the South.

Mara ~ the 106 yr old voter anecdote…. ohhh so sweet

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This is beautiful.

 

boyandobama

“Rosa sat so Martin could walk; Martin walked so Barack could run; Barack ran so our children could fly.”

I don’t know who wrote it, but it’s making the rounds. And I think it’s meaningful.  Even though Obama’s grandmother passed away, she got to vote, and it will be counted. Losing the people who raise you is incredibly difficult. I still often feel at a loss when I think about my dad who I lost to cancer last year. Talking about him still makes me cry, and makes me feel alone. So, I hope the US can cast their ballots today in peace, that the election is by and large uneventful and that your country can heal. And shame shame on the California GOP for filing a lawsuit against Obama (on the day of Toot’s death) for flying his campaign plane to Hawaii to visit his dying grandmother. Mrs. Dunham, thanks so much for raising such an amazing man, and through him your legacy lives on and will (hopefully, God willing) effect great change. As a mother to a child of colour (though we are not American) your legacy is felt in my house too. You rest in peace now.

Mara ~ as your neighbour to the north , I encourage all Americans to do their civic duty, it’s a great privilege

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This is a link that will become much more common in the days to come. With Obama pretty much the next president of the US, more and more whackos are going to be trying to make themselves famous.

So? Is this just the fanatic in the backwoods? Well, maybe these specific two young men are full of hate, gravely mentally ill, and at the fringe. The thing is that the campaign I have watched from my perch in the Great White North that is Canada, I see a party appealing to fear, hate mongering, using coded language, and very poorly hidding body language. What happens when we appeal to the worst in people? I’m not sure that they aren’t inciting hatred. I know that sounds extreme when you juxtapose a political rally to a foiled skin head plot, but it seems like two points on the same slope from here.

There is also this story which I think is a great reflection of the hatred of ignorance and racism. Yes she may be unstable (though apparently that can be debated). She fabricated this story, but notice how it’s supposed to play into all our fears? Accosted by a black man, fondled and beaten by same black man, a backwards B carved into her face apparently to stand for Barack. As if it’s not already difficult to be a black man in the US. And a backwards ”B’? Dude, she carved her face while looking in the mirror. Cray-zee beeyotch? Why yes. Stupid? Most definitly. But still a tragic reflection of the worst of people being brought out by those who want to win at any cost. And that’s sad and more importantly? It may end tragically. It is no secret that Barack Obama received a security detail long before any other presidential candidate. Why do you think that is?

It’s not because of the love.

Mara~ where is the love?

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Okay, this guy is a blowhard that does not deserve any kind of comment, but dude WTF???

At McCain/Palin rallies where effigies of Obama are hung, where the crowd shouts things like “terrorist” “Muslim” (so what if he was…) “kill him” “commie” “traitor” etc etc, why are people who incite hate not being called to the mat by their own party. Is this what conservatives have become in the US? Close minded, racist, isolationist bigots? Please tell me there are more decent conservatives than Colin Powell or David From out there. What is wrong with these people. It’s some kind of bizarro alternative universe where it’s not really about conservative issues like self determinism, small governments and a free market. It’s about who can be the most successful at ‘otherizing’ an historic candidate.

Please go see racist remarks that go unchecked by Rush Limbaugh while Obama has to constantly repudiate John Lewis, why does McCain not have to constantly repudiate Limbaugh.

Wanna know what else I hate? Dick Pound, part of the international Olympic committee (a Canadian) recently said in an interview that we were a land of savages only 400 yrs ago.   First Nations groups in Canada, not so happy with being referred to as savages. Understandable. The best part though is what comes next, you know the apology…  I’m so sorry if what I said offended anyone, that was not my intent and savage is not a derogatory term.

DUDE! This is what I like to call the NON-apology. It’s not “I’m sorry I hurt your feelings”, it’s “I didn’t mean it THAT way, and also? you’re wrong, because I said it was not offensive”  That’s a neat trick right? Appear to be saying sorry but still maintain your racist bastardness. Listen old, white guy, you do not get to determine what is and is not offensive to a group of people that have been systematically abused by a racist government and where inequality is STILL the order of the day. I am so sick of the non-apology! Next time you mess (and we know you well Dick), just say “I am sorry” and shut the eff up.

Mara ~ thank you and good night

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All my readers (all three of them, lol) know I am a liberal, and to my one Canadian reader, liberal isn’t even a bad word EVEN if you are a conservative. That may seem hard to believe but, conservative, liberal, socialized medicine, ‘spread the wealth’, are not inherently derisive terms in Canada.

Anyway, I may not be able to vote in the US election, but it’s probably pretty obvious that if I could Obama would be my guy. Now, because I am white, no one will ever even make the insinuation that I am voting for him just because he happens to be black. And I am a nobody. Seriously. Few people know my name. I have never accomplished anything that would be covered by the Associated Press. I’ve never been on TV, I’ve never saved a life. I am a boring, unaccomplished individual. I get up, work, love my family, read to my daughter, walk my dogs, blog about stuff, go to church, volunteer in my kids’ classroom, do the laundry and deal with the cray-zee. Simply because I benefit from privilege no one would dare question my vote for Barack Obama.

Then there’s Colin Powell. Definitly not a nobody. Someone with an exemplary professional career. Someone important on the world stage. Someone that made decisions that very directly impacted life and death. Someone who travelled the world, met with world leaders and dignitaries, who held very high positions and was well respected from both sides of the aisle. The thing is, see, he’s black. Apparently his accomplishments don’t account for much. He is unable (of course!) to endorse Obama through any type of thoughtful examining of the issues. His education, accomplishments, professional standing and value system are not only disregarded, but are even called into question as to whether or not they actually existed at all.  And if they did exist, it was not due to his ability, but by benevolence of the (white) people around him. Pat Buchanan is calling him an affirmative action general, Rush Limbaugh is implying that it’s all about race.  And to define his decision as having to only do with skin colour and not an alignment of ideology is a GINORMOUS illustration that white privilege lives on. See, the white, conservative, republicans that vote for McCain will never ever ever ever ever be asked if they are voting for John just because he is white.  And white, conservative republicans that are going to vote for Obama (and there are some if the polls are to be believed) are also not going to be asked if they are voting for ObamaPowell’s public endorsement for Obama, and his thoughtful discourse on race, and his decision for this election are a reflection of the thoughtful person I have always seen him to be. Not the black person I thought him to be….

Mara ~ when a campaign begins to appeal to the worst in us, and not aspire to the best in us, well that’s just wrong.

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