Just me

I never know what to write about myself, so maybe I’ll update this page when I can think of something interesting or witty to say. I live in Northern Canada. I have a few dogs.

I’m a preferential adopter. That means I have chosen adoption as the exclusive way to build my family. It was my first choice and I did not arrive at the decision due to infertility. My daughter was born in China. My future daughter will be born in Ethiopia. I’m currently getting licensed to become a foster home.

I believe strongly in adoption reform. I believe strongly in first family inclusion. Oh, that doesn’t sound the way I mean it. Children should be with their first families if all possible. It sounds like I am bestowing ‘access’ and that’s not what I mean at all. I just mean open adoptions should really be open, and not some fabricated story adoptive parents tell natural mothers. It should be enforceable, legally.  And no, I don’t think my adopting is perpetuating a system that I often question. I believe that there is this huge adoption industry that makes its money on the backs of others (namely first mothers) and the big picture is ugly and needs to be addressed in a way that values family preservation as a first value. However, there is a ‘today’ reality for an individual child in this messed up world where children in care here and abroad need and deserve the love of a family when their own cannot provide it.  For some children this is the last, best hope for a family.

I try to identify and acknowledge my white privilege every single day.  I am an anti-racist.

I lost my dad to colon cancer last year and I’m still WAY too messed up about it. I’m an environmentalist, a feminist, a mom, and an overanalyzer.  My life is surrounded by the Kray-zee, and yet somehow we all manage.

You can reach me at chocolaterocks@live.ca is you have any comments. I mostly have comments turned off, but feel free to email me.